SUNFLOWER

nothing matters. cause,
people always leave.

Not Pretty Enough /Kasey Chambers

Am I not pretty enough
Is my heart too broken
Do I cry too much
Am I too outspoken
Don't I make you laugh
Should I try it harder
Why do you see right through me

I live, I breathe, I let it rain on me
I sleep, I wake, I try hard not to break
I crave, I love, I've waited long enough
I try as hard as I can

Am I not pretty enough
Is my heart too broken
Do I cry too much
Am I too outspoken
Don't I make you laugh
Should I try it harder
Why do you see right through me

I laugh, I feel, I make believe it's real
I fall, I freeze, I pray down on my knees
I hope, I stand, I take it like a man
I try as hard as I can

Am I not pretty enough
Is my heart too broken
Do I cry too much
Am I too outspoken
Don't I make you laugh
Should I try it harder
Why do you see right through me

Why do you see
Why do you see
Why do you see right through me
Why do you see
Why do you see
Why do you see right through me
Why do you see
Why do you see
Why do you see right through me
Why do you see
Why do you see
Why do you see right through me

Behind these Hazel Eyes /Kelly Clarkson

Seems like just yesterday
You were a part of me
I used to stand so tall
I used to be so strong
Your arms around me tight
Everything, it felt so right
Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong
Now I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hanging on

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

I told you everything
Opened up and let you in
You made me feel alright
For once in my life
Now all that's left of me
Is what I pretend to be
So together, but so broken up inside
'Cause I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hangin' on

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

Swallow me then spit me out
For hating you, I blame myself
Seeing you it kills me now
No, I don't cry on the outside
Anymore...

inaudible screams. silent struggles.

it's 12:53 now

< Saturday, August 18>

snippets of the school week-

chemistry paper 3 time practice.

collection of QM tutorials by someone else besides mrs. heng

ordering of our class photos (yeah, they are ready already)

the indos selling yummy snacks and allowing us to play games during clb(:

J2s feeling the blues.

sleeping time's seriously compromised. backaches. stomachaches. ulcers. sorethroats. headaches. swollen eyes. pimple breakouts. loss of confidence.

mr. low commented on the moodiness of J2s recently.

for some, the stress felt sometimes is so strifling that it suffocates but fortunately there are things in school that cause us to crack up rather -ahem- unglamly. interesting stuff that we laugh over, 'euphemism' 'oily' and the people related to adeline.

mrs lim is so cute can! she says: "i will personally call you up and strangle you if you get this kind of qn(vectors) wrong for the prelims." and "some tcher chooses to use the GC whenever he lectures cause his handwriting is atrocious."

"see lah, this girl(chin ping) so poor thing. become the OFFICIAL door-opener of the day already, open the door so many times for people liao."

moments later... she asked if some guy needed to go for NAPFA. he said somthing which i did not catch.
in response, mrs lim said: you think mrs lim is a naive little old lady. can bluff luh" she said it in a super "matter-of-the-fact, but absolutely-not-pissed way

the magnificent view of my five boats. i smile cause they're so stylish.

it's 00:29 now

< Monday, August 13>

it has been awhile, not much happening anyway.

we tore away from our sluggish and ineffective MUGGER MODE to pre-celebrate yeesam's bday at J8 last friday!
hoped she liked the mini-celebration we had at pastamania(:

let the photos do the job of narrating what happened:

it's 21:18 now

< Thursday, August 9>

yesterday was national day eve.

there was a mini-concert thingy in sch to celebrate the nation's birthday.
nat of project superstar came, he sang two songs
one with javin and the other solo..

hahaha, some of my friends became very high when nat smiled in our direction whilst he was on stage... we reasoned that he was smiling for the camera later on. LOL!

felt that the pugilistic performance this yr was really very unique. the backgrd music was the 'hyped up' version of some classical music...
in my opinion, the perf put up by the teachers was the best. only one word can describe them: SPASTIC!
some of them really can act man. those exaggerated gestures were hilarious luh!

anyway, went out for a threesome date with carine and chengen afterwards..
upon arrival, saw that at least 60% of the people, mostly secondary sch students, wore red.
yeah, we were in that BRIGHT RED ogl tee to add on to the redness.
singaporean's PATRIOTISM showcased at its highest level?

ate our lunch at subway! yumms
then watched secret at cathay AMK hub.
*be warned, spoilers ahead*
overall the movie was not bad, considering the fact that it was jay chou's virgin attempt at directing. he did a pretty good job.
yupps. and the female lead is a new face i guess? she's got the sweet, innocent yet elegant look. haha, by now, some of my blog readers might think i'm lesbian.
hmms. i think the story is kinda incredulous, like, how can two complete strangers fall in love at first sight?
mutual understnding attainable within a couple of hours or even days:/
possible?

on a side note, the father-son r/s betw jay chou and anthony wong was rather cute. the ballroom dancing and all the nagging as well as the 'cooking for dad' scenes. and did i mention that i like the idea of battling of piano skills very much though im not sure if its possible. but it's really very cool huh.
guess jay chou is quite a piano genius?
talents VS brains VS looks. which do you desire most?

kay la. enough of crapping. i need to use my 5 days or rather 4 days wisely.

many to-dos popping up in litespeed. and there's miracles to perform for my econs and general paper. HAHHAHA.

GRACE, you must study smart! mug hard every day, girl

it's 00:28 now

< Thursday, August 2>

the end is near.

how true indeed. -holds my breath-

oh wells. i just keep doing stuff. out of fear that i will hu si luan xiang... aye, like what xiucuan said:

at this point in time, you will somehow lose confidence de. "especially if your mid years werent that FANTASTIC." lol. the last part is added by me. so yea..

anyway, i heard this song in the canteen tday during common lunchbreak.

All the Small Things /Blink 182

All the small things
True care, truth brings
I'll take, one lift
your ride, best trip

Always, I know
you'll be at my show
Watching, waiting, commiserating

Say it ain't so, I will not go
Turn the lights off, carry me home
nana nana nana na na nana nana nana na na (2 times)

Late night, come home
Work sucks, I know
She left me roses by the stairs
Surprises let me know she cares

Say it ain't so, I will not go
Turn the lights off, carry me home
nana nana nana na na nana nana nana na na (2 times)

Say it ain't so, I will not go
Turn the lights off, carry me home
Keep your head still, I'll be your thrill
The night will go on, my little windmill

Say it ain't so, I will not go
Turn the lights off, carry me home
Keep your head still, I'll be your thrill
The night will go on
the night will go on
my little windmill

it's 23:03 now